Vocabulary for Navigating the Unexpected
Not too long ago, at a year-end school picnic for my children, I came across some posters promoting student values in the school’s auditorium. Still waiting for the student showcase to begin, my eyes blithely wandered across the definitions of kindness and perseverance until one of them caught my eye: resilience. “Ah, such a good one to include,” I thought. After all, resiliency is what our department at World Relief centers around. But when I glanced at the definition on the poster, I stopped. “Isn’t that more like perseverance?” I questioned. Glancing back, sure enough, the poster’s definition of resilience was almost identical to the poster touting perseverance. The teacher inside me grumbled but was ultimately shushed as student performances began.
However, months later, I was still curious about the distinction between the two ideas. I asked our current cohort of Equity & Sustainability Interns, all from refugee and immigrant backgrounds, to take a moment and write out their personal definition of perseverance. The responses were what I would have expected:
“To overcome any challenges or struggles.”
“To continue trying even when it’s hard.”
“The mentality of roughing it out.”
And then I asked them to give their personal definition of resiliency. Pencils and pens hovered above neon sticky notes. “Isn’t it the same thing?” one asked. I repeated my request.
“The mentality of knowing there is always good after bad [and] pushing past hard times.”
“To bounce back.”
“The ability to recover after a negative event.”
“Being hit with challenges over and over again and still being able to stand against it.”
Although often used synonymously, these two words actually do have different meanings, and there is a reason “Resiliency” is the namesake for our set of programming at World Relief Western Washington.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m a huge proponent of grit. Years ago, as a brand-new corps member in Teach For America, when asked what character value I wanted to instill in my students, I confidently said, “perseverance.” After all, self-reliant white-knuckling had sustained and granted me success in my endeavors up to that point. However, over the years, my former students, the World Relief community, and the upheavals of my own life have shown me that perseverance can come up short when the road hits a dead end or, worse, when it gets washed out from beneath us.
The problem is perseverance is not inherently adaptive. Injury, abuse, violence, natural disasters, mental illness, war, forced displacement, political persecution, and other adverse experiences can, in an instant, side-swipe us off the road we were traveling. The story of nearly every refugee includes a moment when life as they knew it was no longer a viable path forward. When faced with setbacks, perseverance tells us to stay the course. It does not readily accept new truths or realities—even the reality that adversity has changed us to our very core. Perseverance may not allow us to pick a new path, to grieve, to rest, or to choose a new destination, but resiliency will.
Resiliency accepts reality and is adaptive. Resiliency is willing to imagine “good after bad,” to quote our intern, and understands that the good might look completely different from anything we have yet envisioned for ourselves. Although many definitions exist, in simple terms, resiliency is the ability to bounce back or rebound from adversity. It also holds a subtle nuance: perseverance expects challenges and detours along the road to our goals; resiliency expects derailments. This change in expectations and the acceptance of hardship, similar to the grieving process, allows us to embrace new realities, heal our trauma, and cut new trails forward. For some, resiliency might mean using the hardship as a strength to pursue new endeavors, or it might mean returning to old dreams and deep-seated aspects of our identity. Either way, resiliency embraces it.
It would be absurd to think that perseverance is not necessary in life. That’s not what I am saying. However, there are inflection points when resilience is needed first. Then, perseverance can come walk alongside it, like a friend, and support it along the way. For many of the people who walk through the doors of World Relief Western Washington, resiliency has meant embracing multiple new realities. My sincere hope is that our programming can be their friend along the way in their journey.
Jerusha English has been a part of the Resiliency Department at World Relief Western Washington for over two years. Originally from Oregon, she spent a decade as a science educator for underserved students in Fort Worth, Texas. Her experience ranges from sheltered ESL instruction to advanced Chemistry. She now overseas our Equity & Sustainability Internship Program and develops curriculum for Resiliency Programs, with a focus on our environmental education programming.